Someday, I might have a son or a daughter. And I know they're going to meet someone one day, and I'm going to try my best to tell them, "Be careful. Don't do something for them, if it's not for you, too. Because you'll regret it if things don't work out." And they're going to look at me like I'm old and silly, and say, "Mom, I'm not going to make the same mistakes you did." And it's going to break my heart as I pray that that is true, and that they truly do find someone who will be worth their gifts and sacrifices.
He is moving out, and he says he wants "space" and so we can't see each other or talk after he's gone, for some indeterminate amount of time. Until he's ready. He doesn't know when he'll be ready to be my friend. He's moving out on Sunday, and he's cutting me off at that point, and he's doing everything in his power to avoid me this week, when it's the last time I have with him for who knows how long.
And he's seeing some girl. And he really likes her, and I don't want him to. I want him to want me, not somebody else. And I'm so ashamed of myself for letting someone break my heart again and again and again. I'm ashamed that I don't have more self-respect than this. That I keep begging him and pleading with him and praying that despite everything he has put me hrough, that he'll take me back.
I hate my life these days. I don't even know who I am anymore. I do't want to be like this, but I don't want to stop loving him.
He is moving out, and he says he wants "space" and so we can't see each other or talk after he's gone, for some indeterminate amount of time. Until he's ready. He doesn't know when he'll be ready to be my friend. He's moving out on Sunday, and he's cutting me off at that point, and he's doing everything in his power to avoid me this week, when it's the last time I have with him for who knows how long.
And he's seeing some girl. And he really likes her, and I don't want him to. I want him to want me, not somebody else. And I'm so ashamed of myself for letting someone break my heart again and again and again. I'm ashamed that I don't have more self-respect than this. That I keep begging him and pleading with him and praying that despite everything he has put me hrough, that he'll take me back.
I hate my life these days. I don't even know who I am anymore. I do't want to be like this, but I don't want to stop loving him.
